Strengthening Family Relationships
Imagine a group of people standing next to each other…
They’re all holding the same string, and one person yanks on the string. Of course, all the others are pulled by that yank.
This is the same as a family. All family members, whether you like it or not, are interrelated.
One thing that impacts one member impacts everyone that is part of that unit.
“Family” can be a sore subject, to say the least.
Simply hearing the words “your family” automatically produces some internal discomfort for you. It’s possible that it brings up some feelings that have been there from your past.
When you were a young child or teen, you may have longed for a “normal family,” as you felt your family was far from normal. Because this was your experience as a child and teen, you have done and will continue to do what you can to give your children a better family experience.
I know all about the challenges families are facing…
When your kids were young, did everything seem easier and everyone happier? Now that they’re teens, everyone is constantly at each other’s throats.
Have annoyance and anger become mainstays in your house? Of course, you need this to change.
Are your attempts to reconnect with your family blowing up in your face and making things even worse? It’s not uncommon for families to grow apart instead of healing together.
Is your family the opposite of your image of what it should be? It’s natural to feel that families should be supportive of one another, lift each other up, bring comfort to one another, and feel like a team.
Are you wondering whether your new family makeup will work out? Things like moving to a new city, divorcing, and trying to function under a new idea of family are exceedingly difficult to cope with.
Has a loss made your family retire to separate quarters? Things like the loss of a job or the loss of a family member are significant life stressors that can make family members go their separate ways.
You are longing to connect to each other again. Family therapy can help.
Dedicating a set, specific time each week will help your family grow as a unit. The simple act of just sitting down with each other shows that you’re all trying, and that effort sets the stage for positive change in your family.
In family therapy, you’ll each have an opportunity to make your voice heard… and your perspective validated and understood. This helps each member of your family feel important, supported, and less isolated.
I’ll help you all find the good intentions behind the conflict between family members. For example, when parents don’t let their child out on the weekends, teens often feel that this is unfair – like their parents do not trust them. In session, though, they’re able to see that parents set this rule out of love and their need to protect their child.
My style for helping you see things through a different lens…
As your therapist, I am a neutral and don’t side with one family member more than the other. My role is to connect with each of you and focus on strengthening the relationship between each of you.
I’ll occasionally use humor to help the family reconnect through sharing fun experiences. We may all play a game that consists of clapping in unison and saying words that come to mind, as we all clap together, one person is usually way off. Trying to be on beat together is often a challenge that brings laughter.
I’ll highlight your various interactions and help each family member gain awareness of their own part of what they’re bringing into the relationship. Often having awareness about things helps shift the negative interactions into positive fulfilling ones.
We’ll also do several activities together. They’re tailored to your family’s needs and aimed at fostering connection.
If it feels right with your family, we will create a family timeline; together we map out significant family life events in chronological order on a poster board. Your family will come up with symbols and pictures that represent the events and through this process learn how to work together and realize how connected you all are by having a visible tangible item that represents things you all have experienced together.
We may engage in card or board games during the sessions, as this helps in relaxing and having some fun together. Often families have deviated away from each other and are caught in a negative cycle of conflict – having some time dedicated to fun as a group helps in managing stress.
Some of the activities will be creating things on paper, poster-board, or engaging in art activities. This helps in feeling a sense of belonging by creating something together and helps in using the different parts of ourselves that we often ignore.
After going through and doing the hard work of family therapy…
You’ll learn to see each other more positively and feel more united as a family.
You’ll feel like a team, having gone through things together instead of all going through things apart.
You’ll understand your differences instead of fighting about them.
You’ll communicate better with each other.
You’ll have emotion regulation tools to remain united and help each other when needed.
Today is the day to start healing as a family.
We all already face so many challenges outside of our home, it’s time to make your home unit as strong as it can be.
Let me help your family reconnect and find support within each other. Give me a call (213) 915-6372; I offer a free 20-minute phone consultation and will answer any remaining questions you have.